


anguish, dire pain, and bitter tears

by Skrigget



Category: Batman (Comics), Batman - All Media Types, Red Robin (Comics), Robin (Comics)
Genre: Aftermath of Torture, Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Batfamily Feels, Bonding, Brotherly Love, Brothers, Damian Wayne Feels, Damian Wayne Needs a Hug, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Everyone Needs A Hug, Fear, Gen, Happy Ending, Scarecrow's Fear Toxin (DCU)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-29
Updated: 2018-10-29
Packaged: 2019-08-09 17:49:40
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,851
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16454558
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Skrigget/pseuds/Skrigget
Summary: Tim hears him before he sees them:Damian screams like he’s being tortured. Dick shushes him gently and tries to hold him closer against his chest comfortingly. It only makes Damian trash harder and scream louder. Dick squeezes his eyes shut tight and grits his teeth.He stares at the sight in front of him and for a moment he is completely frozen in shock. He shouldn’t be so surprised; O had told him Damian had been dozed with enough fear toxin to take down several grown men. But still.





	anguish, dire pain, and bitter tears

**Author's Note:**

> I should really go to bed.

 

**‘Twas Death who broke the banquet up with fears,**

**With anguish, dire pain, and bitter tears.**

 

\-- Novalis, _Hymns to the night_

 

 

 

Tim gets the call from Oracle about five minutes before he’s about to head back home for the night.

She tells him what’s happened and he grits his teeth. With a heavy sigh Tim heads in the directions given to him.

He hears him before he sees them:

Damian screams like he’s being tortured. His back is strung like a bow, his eyes are wide and unseeing, and his entire body is shaking.

Dick shushes him gently and tries to hold him closer against his chest comfortingly. It only makes Damian trash harder and scream louder. Dick squeezes his eyes shut tight and grits his teeth.

Damian screams and screams and fights Dick’s hold desperately, his nails digging into Dick’s skin and making it bleed. His head trashes back and forth and hits Dick’s a few times. Dick, however, never loosens his hold. His arms are tight around Damian, keeping him safe. From the world and from himself. He keeps shushing him quietly.

Then Red Robin finally lands in front of them. He stares at the sight in front of him and for a moment he is completely frozen in shock. He shouldn’t be so surprised; O had told him Damian had been dozed with enough fear toxin to take down several grown men. But _still_. Still, the sight of Damian – the little brat, Robin, his haughty and obnoxious brother – writhing in Dick Grayson’s hold while he screams as if the devil himself is closing in on him is utterly terrifying.

Tim swallows hard and forces himself to walk closer.

“B is on his way,” he tells his older brother. He doesn’t know what else to say.

“Hold his legs,” Dick forces out through clenched teeth.

“Are you – “

“ _Do it_ ,” Dick seethes and Tim can tell how much this is breaking his heart; his little brother (his son) screaming, fighting him like Dick is the one torturing him. So Tim nods and sits down in front of them. He licks his lips uncertainly. Looks at Damian’s face.

His pupils are blows wide; Tim cannot see the blue in his eyes anymore. He isn’t looking at Tim, he isn’t looking at anything at all. He just keeps fighting and trashing, making Dick bleed.

Tim inhales sharply when another desperate scream cuts through the night. He grabs Damian’s legs and tries to force them to be still before he shatters his feet from repeatedly smashing them against the concrete.

It takes the two of them to hold the utterly desperate child still until Bruce finally gets there. It’s longest five minutes of Tim’s goddamn life. Dick keeps shushing and humming and promising Damian that nothing will ever hurt him again. Tim’s too choked up to say anything at all.

The sight of Batman should be a comfort but the way Bruce stops dead at the sight of Damian just makes Tim feel small and unsure again.

Jason is right behind Bruce.

“Fuck,” he curses when he sees Damian and runs past Bruce. He kneels next to the other three. “Fuck,” he whispers again. “How much did he get?”

“Too much,” Dick mumbles. “It’s okay, baby bat, shh, it’s okay, it’s okay, I promise.”

The words breaks Tim’s heart but he isn’t sure why.

They sound pathetic and weak cramped in between Damian’s terrified screams.

“About five times more than the normal dose for someone his size, I reckon,” Tim feels the need to say then. He’s still holding onto Damian’s trashing legs. He’s not sure he’ll ever let go again.

“Get him into the car,” Bruce grunts finally and walks closer. He holds out his arms as if to pick Damian up, but Dick holds him tighter against his chest. “Nightwing?”

“I got him,” Dick says. “I got him.”

No one knows what to say to that.

“Bring him to the car,” Bruce says and turns around then.

Jason and Tim share a look. Tim swallows and Jason nods. Tim isn’t sure when they learned this – to comunicate just through stares – and he decides not to think too hard on it.

“Come on, N,” Jason says. He practically lifts Dick up from the ground; the older man still clinging onto Damian. Tim’s still holding his legs. They keep kicking him in the chest and Tim’s sure he’ll be bruised for weeks to come but he finds he doesn’t care.

He’s going to kill Scarecrow for sure.

Judging by the way Jason’s hand grips Damian’s shoulder Tim’s willing to bet he’ll help him out.

The walk to the car is awkward and the ride is heartbreaking.

Damian finally manages to tire himself out; his voice is hoarse from screaming and he’s got no energy left to fight and yet there’s too much poison surging through his veins for him to simply succumb to sleep. He starts to cry and this is somehow even worse.

His eyes are still wide and unseeing but now big fat tears are streaming down his cheeks. He starts saying something in Arabic. It’s desperate and confused and he sobs loudly.

“It’s okay, Dames,” Jason mumbles.

Bruce hurries through streets, eerily quiet.

“Shh,” Jason continues when Damian continues sobbing and begging for something only Jason and Bruce know. “She isn’t here,” he says. “Everything’s fine, you’re fine. We won’t let anyone hurt you, I promise. Least of all Ra’s. Shhh, baby bat. Dames, it’s _okay_. We’re all okay.”

Tim wonders what Damian sees; what are Damian’s worst nightmares? His biggest fears? Tim’s never asked himself the question before (maybe he should’ve) but all of the sudden he finds that he’s afraid of the answers. He’s pretty sure whatever Damian is afraid of it’s all too real for any of their words to be any comfort to him at all. Tim shuts his eyes. Damian’s legs are heavy in his lab. Tim holds onto them.

They make it to cave in record time but it feels like an eternity.

Dick maneuvers Damian’s exhausted body into his arms and lifts him into the cave. Tim, Bruce and Jason follow. Alfred meets them and the look in his eyes when he sees Damian sobbing against Dick’s chest breaks Tim’s heart all over. This is proving to be a very exhausting night.

Bruce immediately hurries over to the computer while Alfred carefully takes a blood sample so they can fix an antidote as soon as possible. Dick sits with Damian in his arms, rocking him back and forth gently.

Damian sobs and cries and begs.

“I’m sorry,” he shouts. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry – “

“Shh, little D,” Dick hushes.

Back and forth, back and forth.

“Mama!” he screams then, nearly out of breath. “Mama, I’m _sorry_. Father! Father!”  

Jason and Tim stand shoulder to shoulder somewhere between the others and have no idea what do.

Then Damian cries something in Arabic that makes Bruce freeze and Jason’s eyes go wide. For a second everything is still but then Jason bolts into action: he runs over to Dick and Damian and sits down on the cot next to him. He runs a hand through Damian’s hair and whispers something to him in Arabic. Tim’s no idea what he’s saying but it sounds like promises. It sounds like Jason Todd would walk do anything for Damian, it sounds like he’s promising him the world, like he would swim through oceans of pit water to make Damian feel safe again.

Dick rocks him back and forth, back and forth.

Tim has never felt so out of place before. Without anyone noticing he walks upstairs.

Jason keeps whispering sweet nothing, Bruce types away angrily, Alfred preparing the antidote and Dick humming some nonsense lullaby. Damian’s sobs are the loudest noise in the whole fucking cave.

Tim swallows hard, clenches his fists and forces himself to keep walking. He feels like he leaves something important behind.

\---

It’s 4.23 and he’s finally accepted that he’s not going to sleep anymore tonight. With a sigh he throws the covers away and sits up in bed. He runs a hand through his hair and, before he can change his mind, he jumps out of bed and takes off down the hallway.

He hesitates outside Damian’s door.

He heard the other’s carry him upstairs a couple of hours ago. The boy’d been asleep by then. Bruce and Dick had argued over who should stay with Damian but eventually Alfred had won and ushered them both to bed, assuring them that Damian wouldn’t be awake until noon the earliest and that they both needed rest if they wanted to be of any help to him when he did.

Tim hadn’t heard Jason but he’s sure the second Robin isn’t too far away.

Tim opens the door slowly.

The room is silent and dark. Tim inhales deeply and walks inside.

Damian’s is lying on the big bed on his back. At first Tim reckons he looks okay but then he notices the tears sliding down his cheeks and his eyes widen. For a moment he doesn’t know what to do; Damian is having some sort of nightmare – an effect do the leftovers of the poison, no doubt – and Tim’s frozen.

Finally he turns around to fetch Dick or Bruce – or maybe even Jason – when Damian whimpers. This makes Tim stop and turn around to face the bed again.

The boy’s trashing his head from side to side, tears still streaming down his face and little whimpers are leaving his mouth.

This is the boy who’d tried to kill Tim only a couple of years ago, Tim reminds himself. Looking at Damian he feels nothing but utter pity and maybe even a bit of regret, though.

He decides not to dwell on it and before he can think too hard on it he walks back to the bed. He crawls into it and takes Damian into his arms. He cradles him against his chest and rests his chin on his dark, soft hair.

“Shh,” he tries, feeling stunned and unqualified and awkward. “It’s okay, Damian,” he promises weakly. “It’s okay, it’s me Tim. I got you, I got you.”

Surprisingly enough, this seems to help and Damian starts to relax in his arms. Before long he’s breathing evenly again. Tim’s heart is beating so hard it’s a miracle it doesn’t wake Damian up but it doesn’t; the kid is silent in his arms. Silent and warm and asleep.

Tim closes his eyes. He feels very tired all of the sudden.

“I got you,” he whispers again. Damian’s heavy breathing is warm and comforting against his neck and Tim finds himself smiling a bit.

He allows himself to relax. He will have to wake up before the brat does otherwise he’ll never hear the fucking end of it but for now –

For now Tim can hold him close, make sure he’s safe and feel like a big brother for just a little while.

No one else will have to know.

Sleep finally finds him.


End file.
